Elvis on the 2008 Presidential Election

Now alright mama before we get this whole humdinger a shakin, the King is gonna need a few things. Hey, Colonel, could you have them mix me up a peanut butter and banana sandwich with Demerol…and… baby toes. C’mon now, I’m the King! Love me tender, love me sweet…never let me goooooo.

Alright now, so this election…hey Colonel, get me my stuffed giraffe Neckers that Ann Marget gave me outta my yellow Cadillac. What? What do you mean I ain’t got no yellow Cadillac. Ain’t that a kick in the King’s keister! I gots me 4 Cadillacs, but no yellow one! Mmmm, this here sandwich is the tops. Hey Pop, go pick me up a new yellow Cadillac. C’mon now, I’m the King! We can’t go on together, with suspicious miiiiiiiiinds.

Now, you know I’ve done push ups with JFK… karate with Nixon… and I may have even rode one of them unicorns with LBJ, so the King knows a thing or two about these elections, Jack. Hey Trish, can you wipe my brow, I’m sweatin’ on my sandwich now. Thanks Dish, now you go upstairs and wait for me in my velvet bed, the King will be up in a few. Hey Colonel, have them make me another sandwich, this one I want peanut butter, chocolate, a chopped up G.I. Joe, the May ’67 issue of Time Magazine…and baby toes. C’mon now, I’m the King! Oh let me be… your teddddddy beeeaaaaar.

So wait, what’s this? There’s a chocolate cat running for president? Obama what? Hey man, ain’t that a hot pepper! I’m all for it! Whoa, whoa, whoa…slow down the groove for a minute here, what’s with this lady Palin? What, she like that crazy lookin’ old guy’s daughter or something? Now, that is a fox, I tell you what, Jack. If I saw her I’d be all like… Take my hand, take my whooooollllle life too, for I, can’t help fallin’ in love with youuuuuuuu.

Alright, so now I think the secret to this here election is…hey wait, Colonel, can you get me some more pills, you know how the King gets when his head gets all to thinking. And have them mix up the King another sandwich, I’m hungrier than Jackie Gleason was right before he ate Perry Como. Now get it right this time, I want peanut butter, a crushed up moon rock, barbiturates, a two dollar bill…and baby toes. I don’t care if this sandwich is illegal, Jack! So help me God, I will kill all of you with my magic sequin karate!!! Ok, then daddio, make with the sandwich. C’mon now, I’m the King! Im just a hunk, a hunk of burning love
Just a hunk, a hunk of burning loooooooooove.

Elvis is a Buzz Pirates Correspondent

Sarah Palin Faces Tina Fey on SNL

Sarah Palin showed up on Saturday Night Live this weekend. The MILF’s guest spot to open the show was heavily hyped all week. I’ve always liked or at least liked complaining about how good or bad SNL has been for the last several years. Like it or not, its a show that I hope stays on the air forever. Still, I’ve got to be honest and say that I believe they are relying on this Sarah Palin impression by Tina Fey way too much… they should focus more on the show as a whole… generate their own buzz so to speak.

In addition Mark Walhberg showed up in the same sketch as the Alaskan Gov. in a week that followed his anti-SNL comments. Josh Brolin, hot off Oliver Stone’s “W” hosted the show.