Douche of the Day – German Shoe Thief Fox

That’s right you heard me. Turns out a German fox stole 100 shoes in the small western German town of Foehren.

A forest ranger found some shoes near the fox’s den and came upon a smorgasbord of footwear down the foxhole which had recently been stolen from outside locals’ front doors. I guess German’s leave their shoes outside?

“There was everything from ladies’ shoes to trainers,” said a Foehren policeman. “We’ve found between 110 and 120 so far. It seems a vixen stole them for her cubs to play with.”

Although many were missing laces, the shoes were in good condition and their owners were delighted to reclaim them, said the police spokesmen, adding that revenge wasn’t planned against the lil’ rascal. I’m surprised that the people wanted their shoes back after it had weird German fox diseases all over them.

Either way Ms. Fox, get your own damn shoes… not you Megan, you can grab our Buster Browns any time, you lil’ vixen you. Ooh, and the band Vixen you can polish our Bostonians at your leisure… and Foxy Knoxy, Amanda Knox you scare us, but please feel free to peruse our loafers and try to not to sex murder us.

Smile German Shoe nabbing fox, you are Buzz Pirates Douche of the Day.

Megan Fox is Single… So There’s Hope We Might Have a Chance

Megan Fox has called off her engagement with tool Brian Austin Green this week. Guys across America are rejoicing as the the sexy transformers star is now “on the market.” Dudes all over are clamoring to either “marry her on the spot” or at least be a “rebound” guy. Most guys will probably will even see past her ugly tattoos (that’s right I said it!). Well, horrible tattoos Megan Fox is firmly entrenched in the top spot of most “hot girl” lists… she will fill the pages of Maxim, Stuff and the like for years to come. So, I’m here to tell you on behalf of the 22 year old uberhottie that you probably don’t have a chance. Even though she plays Guitar Hero with normal people.

Megan Fox is kind of like Angelina Jolie 2.0 (she was even offered the lead role in the next Tomb Raider). Still, she better get in a popular movie other then Transformers soon, or she’s not going to be able to keep up the hype. Maybe there’s still hope for Wonder Woman? Angelina Jolie has made headlines for way more then simply being a hot chick. Still, dumping that zero and coming off as more available will be helpful in forwarding her career.

We at Buzz Pirates would like to offer our condolences to Megan Fox on her recent break up…and if you aren’t doing anything Friday…