Eastbound and Down Quotes – Kenny Powers Unleashed

With the season finale of Eastbound and Down on Sunday, we figured it was a good time to revisit some of our favorite quotes from our favorite show. I know we are forgetting plenty of great lines, feel free to add them to the comments. I’d also like to say that the principal has become my second favorite character in the show… he was ridiculous in the episode where they had the BBQ.

Here are some of our favorite Kenny Powers Quotes…

(When principal says that he does triathlons) “I play real sports…not trying to be the best at exercising.”

“Why is there blue shit on your face Cleg? What, did you just blow Robocop?”

“There is one vision that gives me constant happiness, your two enormous breasts.”

Principal: “And who is this lovely lady you have here with you?” Kenny: “Lovely? Her?”

“What did I tell you, put something nice on. You look like a busted Daytona stripper.”

“I’m a bulletproof tiger man!”

“Fundamentals are a crutch for the talentless”

“You’re fucking out!” (and the title of Kenny’s audio book “You’re Fucking Out, I’m Fucking In”)

“You named your daughter after fucking Titanic? Haha, what’s this one’s name…Shrek?…guess not”eastbound-down6

“What’s up, Deshauna?”

(when asked by his gym class if he was in rehab because he hurt himself) “Yeah I hurt myself….My nose” (and winks)

(After hugging April) – “Yeah girl, I’m going to have to change my pants. I’m just kidding… I didn’t cum myself”

“I’m not going to stop yelling because that would mean, I lost the fight!”

Interviewer: “So Kenny, how do you like playing in New York?” Kenny: “You mean Jew York…its fucking great.”

“I thought the blacks in Baltimore were bad, shit, they’re nothing compared to these fags you got here in San Francisco…haha”

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