Top 25 Charlie Sheen Quotes – Winning.

Charlie Sheen is epic. Charlie Sheen has porn star goddesses living with him. Unless you are living under a rock, you’ve seen the warlock that is Charlie Sheen on fire recently, appearing everywhere, spewing venom and craziness in the wake of his show number 1 rated show,  Two and a Half Men, being taken off the air. I’ve never seen Two and a Half Men, but it is now my favorite show. It appears that Charlie Sheen finally has the power to beat up Chuck Norris and Mr. T at the same time. The guy has become a human quote machine, so enjoy his 25 best quotes… so far. We are sure there are more to come so feel free to add any we missed.

25. “I have a disease? Bullshit. I cured it with my brain.”

24. “Winning, anyone? Rhymes with winning. Anyone? Yeah, that would be us. Sorry, man, didn’t make the rules. Oops!”

23. “I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars.”

22. “You can’t process me with a normal brain.”

21. “If you borrowed my brain for five seconds, you’d be like, ‘Dude! Can’t handle it, unplug this bastard!’ “It fires in a way that’s maybe not from, uh… this terrestrial realm.”

20. “I was banging seven-gram rocks, because that’s how I roll.  I have one speed, I have one gear: Go.”

19. “Can’t is the cancer of happening.”

18. “Wow.  What does that mean? I’m bi-WINNING.”

17. “I am battle-tested bayonets, bro.”

16. “C’mon bro, I won best picture at 20. I wasn’t even trying. I wasn’t even warm.”

15. “Look what I’m dealing with, man, I’m dealing with fools and trolls.”

14. “It’s just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee, because I don’t have time for these clowns.”

13. “You have the right to kill me, but you do not have the right to judge me. Boom. That’s the whole movie. That’s life.”

12. “I’m sorry man, I got magic and I’ve got poetry in my fingertips, you know, most of the time, and this includes naps.”

11. “I’m an F-18, bro.”

10. “I’m not Thomas Jefferson. He was a pussy.”

9. “I’m so tired of pretending my life isn’t perfect and bitching and just winning every second and I’m not perfect and bitchin’.”

8. “The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards, all of them look like droopy-eyed armless children.”

7. “The only thing I’m addicted to right now is winning.”

6. “I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words — imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.”

5. “[CBS] picked a fight with a warlock.”

4. “If you’re a part of my family, I will love you violently.”

3. “I am on a drug, it’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available because if you try it you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.”

2. “I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People who aren’t special. People who don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA.”

and of course the easy pick for number 1…

1. “Winning.”